My goal this summer is to retire and visit every waterfront bar in the Puget Sound by dinghy and watch a Mariners game on their televisions. I have a great little inflatable dinghy that is 9’6” long, and has a 15-horsepower Mercury 2-stroke outboard motor with electric start.
My fantasy is to start in the San Juans at Roche Harbor Resort, hit a different bar every day, camp out, and end up at Safeco Field (in a bar, of course). I calculate there are about 100 waterfront establishments to visit on my journey, so this could take a long time.
I already have some experience with this, but I have never crossed big water like Rosario Strait. This makes me a little nervous, but what could possibly happen? Drown?
Oh, yeah, I want to write about my experiences, or blog it, or Youtube it. Or better yet, I could write about it for the Channel Marker (Mary Pfost asked me to–yes, really). I figure I could become a restaurant and travel critic. I could also rate my experience, giving each bar a rating–five dinghies being an outstanding experience, and one dinghy being not so good.
I also have a fantasy of getting a sponsor for this endeavor. You know, like the Mariners, Budweiser, Mercury. I asked a local bar in LaConner–a bar I have spent a considerable amount of money in–if they would sponsor me by buying me a burger and a Coors Light in exchange for a glowing and smartly written review in the hugely popular Channel Marker periodical. The owner wore not so much a look of surprise, but a look of sadness and disappointment that a person that is employed by the pubic school system didn’t understand a basic economic concept. That she, the restaurant owner, had just provided me a bar stool to sit on for three hours so I could watch a Mariners game on her television while she served me delicious hot food and cold beverages, and that I wanted her to somehow provide all these services for free. After she pointed out the flaw in my logic, I did indeed feel foolish. She suggested I raise the money by fund-raising (or begging). If you want to sponsor me, send me a dollar on Pay Buddy or beggingforburgersandbeer.com or something.
I won’t be able to take this trip until late summer, as I still need to finish the school year, so I thought I might start off by rating some of the bars in LaConner. Please look for my article next month, where I will rate the suds and Mariner opportunities of the Oyster and Thistle. It’s not exactly waterfront, but I haven’t been there, and I’m curious about a bar that openly advertises that they serve thistles. Sounds risky!